But I haven’t really had anything blog-like to write about
anyway.
I probably still don’t. Ha!
I went to the reserve today. Apparently being in the woods
gives me ideas, because I recorded over twenty minutes of story thoughts to
myself today as I walked.
…I am trying to share my thoughts on these thoughts…trying
to relay the struggle I am facing. But I guess, at the core, it isn’t really a
struggle. Maybe I am trying to make myself at war with myself, when I am really
not.
The thing is this: I thought of a way to connect two dreams.
But in order to do that, in that way, then this certain guy sort of takes on a
God-like…ness. Like, in that moment, he is sort of the hands and feet of God…and
I like that. I think. But at the same time, I am unsure if that is…well, best,
for it to happen in that situation. With that guy.
…And I am being way too preemptive; this won’t come into the
story until like book three. Dummy, stop stressing.
…Here is what I don’t want: I don’t want the relationship
between my girl and that guy to be…misunderstood. I mean, I know that someone,
somewhere, will misunderstand, and that’s fine; whatever. But I don’t want to
send the wrong message. Misunderstanding must be on their part, not mine. Some
people are not safe, and will never be safe; some people will not change. …But…some
people do change. And I think I do a pretty good job of showing his…everything.
How he was, and how he is now.
But he is not the love interest.
And he is not going to be the love interest.
…Yet…he becomes extremely important to her. In fact, at the
moment…I know more about their relationship than I do the relationship between
her and the love interest. And that is sort of fine, because this story is not
about romance, but about redemption.
I just don’t want to send the message that she…I don’t know.
Can’t choose between them, so she tries to have both? I am not trying to be
_______ here. [I won’t name names. ;) ]
…So anyway. There is no resolution to this yet, so this is
where I shall end it. Haha!
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