“P” is for pretty/purple prose
Purple prose: prose text that is so extravagant, ornate, or flowery as to break the
flow and draw excessive attention to itself. Purple prose is characterized by
the extensive use of adjectives, adverbs, zombie nouns, and metaphors.
I get lost in physical description. Some
writers can describe trees in a poetic way, but I’m like, “Uh…it looks like a
tree. With leaves. And bark. It’s tall and stuff. The leaves are green. OH! And
there are branches because, you know, it’s a tree.”
*facepalm*
Characters are worse. Some writers use
purple prose to detail every aspect of their characters: her heart-shaped face
(what kind of heart? a Valentine-type heart or an actual heart? because one is
kind of awkward and the other is something I’ve never seen a person’s head
shaped like), long tresses that flowed like a waterfall down her slender shoulders
(so her hair is crushing her shoulders? yikes), azure eyes that dazzled like
the ocean under a rising sun (what if I’ve never seen the ocean? are people’s
eyes really azure?)…
I’ll never write purple prose. Why?
Because when I read it, I blank out. Even if I get through (I usually have to
reread), I forget it. It’s overwhelming, so my brain detaches. I skim.
WORK IT IN TO THE STORY!
I’m kind of a minimalist. For being a
writer, I’m probably too visual. I can see it, but I can’t make words of it. I’m
working on describing settings better, but no one will ever picture my
characters exactly as I do, even if I describe them in detail. Mas is dirty blond;
people still picture him dark-haired. So what? Even my narrators don’t see others
the same way. Rab notices a man’s build before anything else about him,
instinctively calculating how much of a threat he is. Ari tends to focus on
eyes, drawn to the feature that gives away her mother’s moods the most. If both
girls saw the same things in people, I’d lose that subtle difference.
Neither girl overtly states whether her
respective love interest is attractive, handsome, or whatever else. Those are
throwaway words. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I prefer to show
attraction through interaction. (Though the last hopefully shows disgust.)
~Heat washed across my face and down my
neck, once again leaving me acutely aware of the low neckline of the tunic. It
wasn’t anywhere near as low as some of the girls I’d seen flitting about, but
it was lower than I was used to. I tugged at it, wishing once again that it didn’t
show so much skin. His gaze dropped to follow the movement, his lips parting,
and I jumped at the opportunity to look away, drawing my hands inside my
sleeves.
~ His eyes returned to mine and held for
a moment before gliding over my lips and toward my chest. His grip tightened on
my waist, his thumb edging higher up my side. My mind zeroed in on the pressure
of his touch, something between confusion and delight flushing through me.
~Without a word, he grabbed a few bowls,
balancing them in the crook of his arm. My eyes traced over the muscle, and I
spun on my heel toward the back room.
~She grinned. “But see? He’s not old,
fat, or gross, is he?”
Heat filled my cheeks. “Oh, hush.”
~He blinked once, glanced down at
himself, and brushed the fingers of his right hand over his chest. Heat blazed through
my face as I followed the movement, and I huffed, tearing my eyes away.
~He removed his bracers, waited for the
guard to rearrange the items in his hands, and surrendered them as well. He whipped
his tunic off over his head, leaving only a sleeveless black shirt behind. I
winced but kept my gaze steady. Numerous tattoos dotted his right arm, one
presumably for each of his ranks. He gave the tunic to Stoic Face, exchanged some
words with him, and started massaging his forearms, his muscles rippling under
the movement. I wrinkled my nose and swiveled my attention back to Sorek.
How about you? As a writer, how do you
handle description? As a reader, what do you think of purple prose?
No comments:
Post a Comment